I am dumber for both reading this and agreeing with you.

The offseason shitpostin has begun 😭

¹⁰⁄₁₀ first offseason shitpost

“every shot bronny makes only happened because Lebron exists”

Get Savannah in there with the assists too

Lol I chuckled at this. Quality shitpost.

By this logic, Rick Brunson the GOAT Knicks point guard

Dell Curry is the greatest shooter of all time by this logic.

100%agree, not only that, he should be awarded 1 point for every 2 points bronny makes as well.

Hate it. Agree.

Lebron’s longest assist arc in NBA history

There’s assists, secondary assists, and potential assists.

Now introducing paternal assists

Adam of Eden is the all-time assist leader and no one will ever convince me otherwise

An assist is credited to the player tossing the last pass leading directly to a made field goal, but only if the player scoring the goal demonstrates an immediate reaction toward the basket after receiving the pass.

Bronny did not immediately go to the basket after conception, therefore it’s not an assist

You actually make a great point

The offseason is officially here

So like two assists a game

It’s so stupid yet it’s so brilliant

What a glorious way to begin the off-season. Well done OP.

I must ask is this OC or did you pull it from elsewhere? If OC how long have you been sitting on it for?

This may be my favorite NBA related post since the “should the nets kill 5 players” post lmfao. Well done

Really every assist should go to James Naismith, for inventing the ability to put a ball through a elevated broken basket

The offseason is HERE

Finally a good fucking post on this sub. The off season has begun 🙌

What does the momma get?

A 0.08 assists a game boost would be pretty cool.

r/nbamemes is that way, buddy.

I think that would be more like a secondary/hockey assist, which are not tracked in basketball

At the rate Bronny is going I don’t think Lebron will ever have all time assists record even with this proposal.

Now Joe Bryant would definitely have it and Dell Curry would be near Stockton’s record.

Interesting point, but you can only assess one assist per possession.

Therefore, since Lebron’s claims to any assist occurred first, we need to also take away any assist heretofore credited to other players on a Bronny basket.

Gentlemen we have arrived. The NBA offseason is here.

Dell Curry retroactively the all time leader in assisted 3s.

If he assists a Bronny bucket in game, does he get two assists in one go then?

Hell yeah, it’s NBA off-season baby

And every 3 Steph makes counts towards Dell’s career stats. Only the 3’s though

And it’s officially off season.

Thank you for your genuine contribution to the off season

100% agree. This is a GOOD take

Quality shitpost

Finally, this sub is back to things that matter!

We are truly in the offseason in this subreddit lol

Peak offseason, close the sub at least until the draft

MVP-level glazing going on here. It’s kinda impressive

Offseason Started

Between this and the All-Divorce Team, we are eating this offseason!!

All time offseason opener

jordan should get all the stats of anyone named after him

So does Dell Curry hold the assist record then?

Someone (definitely not me) needs to do the math on how this changes all time records for other legacy players. If fathers get assists for every made fg by a son, I have to think Curry and others gets a hefty boost.

Offseason off to great start 😎

How long did you have this in your drafts

Super Valid

And so the James assist dynasty began in the year 2026.

Does this mean Bill Simmons gets an assist for every 6th man vote that Payton Prichard gets? 

hey fuck you bro

“LeNut for 3! Count it.”

so another 7-8 assists a season 

1. Offseason is so long

2. I only agree if that applies to other athlete fathers so Mike Conley Sr. can keep getting assists

Definitely worthy of the first off season post.

Bro the offseason JUST started and we already getting peak.

Off season is just a few days old and it’s already in peak form of shit posting

Waited all year for this time

LMAO I’m a knick fan so still luxuriating but also read this and was like yesss, we in offseason shit post mode now lol

Dell Curry is the all-time scoring leader between the 3 careers he’s currently responsible for

With this post it’s officially the offseason

Someone posted something like this (though I don’t remember if it was here or r/nbatalk months ago when LeBron got his first assist to Bronny so I did the math and LeBron would actually move out of the top 5 because Joe Bryant and Dell Curry would surpass him.

The top 5 would be Stockton (including his son’s four field goals), Dell Curry (including Steph and Seth’s shots), Joe Bryant (including Kobe’s 11,719 field goals), Chris Paul, and Jason Kidd.

Also, Rick Barry moves into the top 15 thanks to his three sons, Melvin Booker moves into the top 50, despite only having 74 assists himself, thanks to his son Devin, and Stan Love becomes top 100 thanks to Kevin.

Bronny had 21 FGs his first season and 47 FGs this season…why not

OP, some of the greatest minds in human history were initially dismissed as “shitposters”. Ignore the detractors.

Off season shit posting has begun

This is what this sub allows? But will remove other posts? Seriously? I thought I was on the NBAmemes sub. This is pathetic.

Bronny hate is just low-effort karma farming.

I got curious so I vibe-coded a script to pull the father-son duos from Wikipedia and pull NBA/ESPN stats for each individual.

It parsed 111 father-son pairs from 103 fathers and resolved career totals for 201 of 214 unique players.

This is the Top-25 father career assists plus hypothetical son-FGM assists

What does Bronny’s mom get? She did all the heavy lifting, having Bronny.

Dell Curry and Joe Bryant suddenly become Hall of famers. 

damn this gonna boost his career assist by like 30 when it’s all said and done 

Welcome to the offseason

The offseason JUST started. Like 1 day ago

I don’t think Lebron cares about another 25 assists

The offseason.

Hockey assist. Second person who passes before the assist.

It’s just going to be a rounding error to his actual assists numbers

Damn if I wasn’t so high up on the Knicks Rn this would be dominating the off season for me cause you’re right.

Let the off-season begin

Someone create an all time hypocrite starting 5. And a activist only for the brand starting 5

So like 4 assists?

The off-season just started bro…

So does this apply to Dell Curry as well? 

When LeBron retires will his assists still count? LeBron could be averaging 0.1 assists per game when he is sitting at home watching Bronny play garbage time minutes. insane

F5 season is here baby!

Does Dell Curry get an assist for all of Curry’s shots?

How many seasons will bronny play after lebron retires?

Looks like I got beat to it, but Dell Curry get in here, you’re the actual GOAT

We officially in offseason baby!

you’re in the right sub for Bronny Sr glazing but the wrong sub for posting this stupid ass shit.

Good off season content.

Fuck nepotism

Lakers should do Lebron a favor and waive Bronny this summer so he can go with daddy to Cleveland

Makes sense 

Why would LeBron want 1 extra assist and 30 extra misses every game (shouldn’t Bronny’s failures count against LeBron by this logic?).

I have a crazy idea for how Nick Cannon could beat John Stocktons all time assist record

Offseason shit posts begin with a BANGGG

you’re assuming Bronny is going to make a lot more shots than he’s going to, to get that record

“Good, good, let the hate flow through you” - Palpatine

ahhhhh offseason posts

Do you think Bronny will make 3.8k buckets? That’s what it will take to get him there 😂

Well he wouldn’t accumulate many assists that way.

LeSperm

Sperm assists

Del Curry out there agreeing hard with you. He’s the new all time assist leader.

Under the principle “it takes a village to raise a child”, clearly any member of the hometown the player grew up in up to the point they went to college would be worthy of an assist. For New York players, this means each basket generates millions of assists.

On the other hand, Akron Ohio residents around during the childhoods of LeBron and Steph had the unique situation of assisting on both teams 1A players during the Dubs/Cavs Finals era, and setting a record of over 400 assists for 3s in a single season.

offseason posting starting early huh

Disagree, Savannah James is the one dishing out Bronny Dimes.

it will make that much different any way ,, count them up