Colin Cowherd on the Lakers after last night’s loss to the Thunder: “Sometimes it’s hard to tell a fake Louis Vuitton bag from a real one until they’re next to each other.”
“A Chrysler looks like a Phantom, until a Phantom pull up”
Shoutout Katt Williams
Rip to one of da best
He is very much still alive lol
Sometimes it feels like he’s still with us
I can still see his face sometimes
Killed the guy for no reason
RIP boss hogg
In our hearts.
I didn’t even know he was sick
Shiiiieeeeeetttttt
The Goat. Here’s the link if you want a quick laugh: https://youtu.be/StA4UN2NtqI?si=gvC9zygYvg2j-MTb
Hardest I’ve ever seen someone kill onstage was Katt in Oakland, around 2008. “A TIGER???” He killed so hard the crowd was standing up for portions. At the end, glazed in the shiniest sweat patina, he’s about to go into his closer, where he would be fucking the stool. He kneels behind the stool and some lady from the audience audibly says “I can take the place of that stool for you!!” He stop what he’s saying. He asks her to repeat what she said. She says it again. He tells her to come up to the stage. She’s a really good looking woman about 6’ tall in high heels, probably about a size 16–THICK. She towers over him. He grins looking up at her. He motions for her to replace the stool. She gets down and he gets behind her. He looks up sheepishly at the crowd and then back at the woman a couple times, sighs deeply and says “I was going to do my closer, but I think I’m just going to go and fuck this woman backstage.” Drops the mic, they walk out together. Standing ovation.
Thank you for sharing your truth. It’s beautiful
This would be a great pasta
Hardest I’ve ever seen someone destroy a buffet was Zion in LA, around 2023. “A BUFFET???” He killed so hard the wait staff were standing up for portions. At the end, glazed in the shiniest sweat patina, he’s about to eat three lobster tails and two stakes the wait staff just put down. He starts to pour butter in the lobster and Moriah Mills from the booth next to him and audibly says “I can take the place of that lobster for you!!” He stop what he’s saying. He asks her to repeat what she said. She says it again. He tells her to come over to his both. She’s a really good looking woman about 6’ tall in high heels, probably about a size 16–THICK. She towers over him. He grins looking up at her. He motions for her to replace the lobster. She gets down and he gets behind her. He looks up sheepishly at the wait staff and then back at the woman a couple times, sighs deeply and says “I was going eat this lobster, but I think I’m just going to go back to my hotel and fuck this woman.” He has the wait staff box up his steak and lobster and they walk out together. Standing ovation.
boy i love me some fresh pasta. nothing like it.
Legend
Fucking legend
Fresh pasta on a Friday? Don’t mind if I do.
Please tell me that’s actually true 😂
Was going to say Cowherd just stole the line 🤣
[opens page]
[CTRL+F]
“phantom”
Okay, we’re good here.
This a bar ngl.
Dude is an asshat but that’s a cold ass line from him lol
His divorce analogies are one of one
More accurately more than several of more than several
I swear analogies are the only reason I listen to Colin
What are some of your favorites that you can remember?
Not an analogy but my favorite quote of his is “LeBron we’re good we have Ben Simmons”
How many has he done? The only one I can think of is when the chargers moved up to LA with the new logo. He compared it to a recently divorced man in his 40s trying to go clubbing with a young bimbo. 😂
This comment reminds me of my divorce
He’s always been good at odd analogies
I always thought he was supposed to be a decent person, what makes him an asshat?
Said John Wall can’t be a good leader because he didn’t have a father growing up. His father passed due to cancer when Wall was eight.
“Let me tell you something: I’m a big believer, when it comes to quarterbacks and point guards. Who’s your dad? Who’s your dad? Because I like confrontational players, I don’t like passive aggressive. Strong families equal strong leaders. Talent? Overrated. Leadership? Underrated. And you can say, well, Colin, can you just go out and say anything crazy and get people to e-mail. That’s not the point. You wouldn’t e-mail if I was an idiot, because you wouldn’t listen to the show. You listen to the show because we make good points.”
Cowherd has said some asinine things- shame he gets paid still to blurt out nonsense
Could be said about a lot of people in the media / spotlight
I love the herd, but I don’t really listen to him anymore. A million years ago I’d listen to him on my drives into college and was in awe at his ability to carry a conversation all by himself for several hours, and his takes and spins seemed very clever. Fast forward some years, however, and he seems to cater more to the broadest audience possible, which I get makes business sense, but makes for a disappointing comparison to new vs. old. Also he’s been picking, imo, very annoying co-hosts since Kristine Leahy moved on in her career, which ads to the decrease in quality of his show.
Nutshell: I can’t speak for all the people, but he’s transformed himself from a unique thinker to just another hot take artist / clicks merchant.
I’ve read lots of great things from people that have worked with him. People seem to speak glowingly about how good of a co-worker/boss he is, that he always makes time to speak with anybody that wants to speak with him and that he will actively try to help them with whatever they need.
I’m not a fan of the guys work. He says way too many ridiculous things as well as constantly contradicting himself (you can find compilations people put together of him constantly contradicting his stances on things in sports). But I also understand he’s got 15 hours a week to fill on tv/radio, it wouldn’t surprise me if he doesn’t believe or even remember half the shit he says and is just saying shit to take up time.
It’s a good one, but it’s not original. I’ve definitely heard that before, but fair enough because it is applicable
It’s a play on the Katt Williams Phantom line I believe
he’s good bro, he’s good.
I’m 41, why tf am I seeing “bar” pop up suddenly out of nowhere and all over this specific thread? Old jokes aside, what’s the meaning?
A ‘bar’ is a line from a rap song. Anyone saying “that’s a bar” is saying “that’s a really good line/quote”
Respect on first reply being helpful
This is from your generation breh
Youre not that old man come on
It refers to a bar in music as in a short segment, but more specifically it is used to mean a good line in hip-hop. A line everyone remembers and will quote.
Old slang from the 90s 2000s. Not out of nowhere at all u just haven’t been acquainted with hip hop in the past 30 years.
You’re seeing it here because it is a bar. It’s not new slang.
It’s a music term and in this case it’s specifically referring to a rap bar, like a quick witty or clever line.
Copy pasting from a commenter who knows music:
“In written music, the vertical line that separates one measure from the next is called a barline or a “bar.”
(A “measure” is a group of how many beats you’re counting. Most pop songs are counted in groups of 4 beats, so “1-2-3-4” is one measure. “1-2-3-4-1-2-3-4-1-2-3-4” is three measures.)
Musicians often use the term “bar” and “measure” interchangeably. “Let’s start from bar 5” means to start at the fifth measure.
I don’t pay attention to rap lyrics enough to recognize the use of the word “bar” in a rap tune, but since lyrics are rhythmic, the ending or beginning of a line of lyrics would coincide with the beginning or ending of a “bar” of beats. A certain lyric line might be four “bars” long, for example. From there, you could assume that the terms for lines of lyrics and musical bars might start to be used interchangeably, but that’s just a guess on my part.”
The loss won’t matter on judgement day.
Ya I doubt Skynet will put NBA wins and losses into consideration
The Trisolarans wouldn’t for sure. They’re Suns fans
I thought they hated their suns, on account of how destructive they are?
They like our sun though
After the last two games, im not sure I like our Suns either
I had to check what sub I was in while reading this thread.
He proclaims it!
Skynet is perpetuating the toxic ring culture
Kawhi literally beat LeBron.
Found Jaden Iveys burner
Judgement day is flat
The Lakers are not RIGHTEOUS!
This is hilarious and should become an r/nba copypasta
I think we’re already there lol
Calm down, Papa John’s
I know it’s weird but it’s Judgment, not Judgement.
I only mention this because I think it’s stupid and it bothers me all the time.
Say what you will about him, he drops WILD one liners
I think about “Hey Lebron, we’re good. Ben Simmons is here” every single day
i dno how people dont roast him for this constantly
He’s not a serious person and drops 500 hot takes per day so people forget. If he got roasted for every stupid thing he said, people wouldn’t have time for anything else.
Dropping hot takes while getting paid? This guy is living our dream!
Not only that, all us losers on reddit are arguing about his takes, even ones from years ago!
I remember when he was on sportsnation, I was very young but I loved that whole crew. It was weird getting older and seeing him being so crazy
him and Beadle were the GOAT pairing
Yup and Marcellus and I feel terrible I can’t remember the 4th person. They did have a bit of a revolving door on the desk
“So crazy” lol he fucking supports all the favorites and most of his takes mild. So crazy indeed
This is obviously completely ridiculous in hindsight, but the hype around Simmons at that time was also really crazy. I don’t remember what the reaction to this take was in real time but I do remember people saying that Simmons was 1⁄1 and could be the next LeBron etc.
Funny enough it was Kobe who said he could be an all-timer BUT he needed to develop an outside shooting presence. Pretty prescient take that ended up being 100% true
I mean it wasn’t that prescient if you have eyes. He was an allstar with just his defense, passing, and driving ability. A jump shot was the only thing between him and being a modern magic.
well yes but most of the people replying to me are acting like Simmons was never even good, let alone great, so
A lot of people also discount how much he fucked up his back. Is part of his game collapsing mental? Yeah probably; but how much of that is because of lingering injuries?
this is a fair point absolutely. back injuries are debilitating also, it’s not something you can just tape up and deal with. I don’t think he was the toughest competitor to begin with and then you combine that with chronic injury (he missed his whole rookie year hurt also) and serious scrutiny from like the whole basketball world and unfortunately how it turned out is just the perfect storm of shitty circumstances in my opinion. it doesn’t totally absolve him in my opinion but it does make everything more understandable than it does in other cases where guys end up busting, if you even consider him a bust
Even if he bricks every 3 he takes if he could hit 80% of his ft he’s probably still an All-Star instead of out of the league.
I’ve said this before but he didn’t have to be Steph from distance, he just had to be willing to take a couple a game and force the defense to consider that as an option
Believe me I’m well aware. That’s all we were asking for.
Obligatory fuck the coangelos.
Literally everyone said that. It was assumed he’d at least try at some point.
Hold on we not gone do this that ONE year Ben did look magical(pun not intended)- I remember they played Cleveland and LeBron actually did look old during that game
People acting like Simmons did not have an absurd amount of hype and was always a bum are doing revisionist history. I live in Philly and the hype around him at that time was absolutely insane. Simmons dug his own grave due to a weak mentality and lack of willingness to meaningfully improve his game combined with injury
Easily one of the worst basketball takes of all time. Right up there with “fate of the universe on the line”.
I think that one is worse honestly
Same but when he said “Two Titties” instead of two cities while looking straight at Joy Taylor
legendary clip
Imagine if Ben Simmons rolled up with a backwards hat the next day.
Nobody has better divorce metaphors
Or dating your daughter metaphors.
You can hate but probably a lot of people in his target audience are divorced dads lmao
Colin cowherd could teach a master class in rage baiting.
Close your eyes and imagine Tatum is still goated
The Tatum one is the most genuine hatred I’ve seen from an individual it’s amazing. I don’t think I will ever muster up the vitriol of “When I close my eyes and think of Tatum, I don’t see anything”
If you watch Cowherd with the understanding that he’s rage baiting, he’s actually entertaining to watch. He’s pretty funny.
Isn’t even ragebaiting. The purpose is to be entertaining. All his takes are technically valid.
Even the racist ones?
I’ll throw him on sometimes when I’m working from home because I genuinely enjoy watching him come up with takes and one liners like this in real time. He’s got a gift for bullshitting on the spot.
His show is generally pretty good. The only people that hate haven’t watched his show before.
Nah it’s a ripped line from at least earlier this week about everyone thinking their car is hot shit until a Rolls Royce Phantom parks next to it
It’s ripped from a Katt Williams stand up he did like 15 years ago.
It’s so weird seeing him on national shows. I grew up with this guy on my local news.
Damn, man called them the “Canal Street” Lakers… crazy
LOL okay that is funny
Lmao but maybe only NYC people get it?
Cultures should be exchanged for the betterment of the world 🙏🏼
I’m no expert but I’m guessing it’s a street in NYC that sells lots of fakes? I think every major city has one of these.
When people say “Chinatown” for NY, they usually mean Canal street. Where all the shop fronts are set up.
Think it’s more like Santee Alley since Canal Street is in NY.
Only NYers, especially Knicks fans, will get this comment 🤣🤣🤣
Only knicks fans would think only Knicks fans would get this
YOU CAN ONLY GET A BAGEL IN NY, BRO!!!!
Or anyone with a 3rd grade reading level that can understand context clues
Who knows maybe the Nets fan might get it
Yo why he gotta bring New Orleans into this? /s
Santee Alley Lakers. Iykyk
Thunder are unrighteous
Thunder don’t appreciate that god gave us burgers and fries. I like apple pie.
Idk what this means but we’re like in burgerland america and i’m upset by that comment.
Now if you’ll excuse me i’mma get a big mother Tucker from Tucker’s Onion burgers and die at 40 from heart disease.
Dw for once this isn’t a targeted OKC joke, just something Ivey said on live.
Didn’t know that but i’m just shit posting lol
That’s why we have to have a pastor come and pray for us before every game.
Some of us have known this for almost 20 years
Bar
Ngl Colin has lowkey grown on me.
ever since I found out he was the only clean guy in the Joy Taylor situation, i’ve been a huge fan
bro just shows up, gives terrible takes then goes home to his family
respect
Not only that, he can do it for 3 hours a day every day. That is talent.
And terrible takes are fine in sports as long as you explain them, which he does.
Unfortunately, bars.
R/lakers will hate on this but game recognize game.
Cowherd has made a career out of these analogies. He’s the best in the business at making them.
Not saying the Lakers have a chance against OKC but when did the regular season become any indication of how a team would matchup in the playoffs? Never mind. I get it. Lakers blowout = clicks and views. Hornets blew out the Thunder & everybody just moved along lol
If the Spurs dont sweep the Thunder I will ask for a refund on the regular season.
I know a lot of people think the spurs vs thunder reg season means we’re toast, but it’s been 4 months. We re-tooled, got Mccain bc of that, and have a healthy squad.
It’ll be a heck of a series but the december matchups really don’t have any bearing on playoff matchups
Im just making a joke about people overreacting. I think the Thunder would beat the Spurs in an actual series.
Well everyone moved along because it’s an obviously foregone conclusion that the Hornets are winning the chip and nipples will get finals mvp
Bonk. Go to Hornets jail.
Regular season wins matter because Wemby says so
Wemby cries after winning a regular season game: Aww, youre so sweet🤗
Pat Bev cries after winning the playins and going to the playoffs: Hello, human resources!?!😳
It doesn’t matter near as much as we think. I remember feeling pumped when we got to play Portland with Westbrook and PG because we swept them in regular season. Cue Dame Time and the shot that ended that whole experiment.
Yaaaaaaaa, probably once a week we have a post that blows up asking why people think we may struggle in the postseason. And all I can do is shake my head and pray that they are right lol Because I’ve watched teams show out only to be shown the door.
Even with our regular season record against y’all, y’all genuinely terrify me 😂. Good luck in the postseason, I hope one of us makes it, I feel like either way would make a great story!
You’re absolutely right. A playoff series between these two teams could be somehow even more lopsided than this game.
Even prior to Luka’s injury, the Lakers don’t have the players to put up a credible playoff defense against a shortened Thunder rotation.
The 1996 72-win Bulls got blown out in the regular season by the Knicks. Then they beat them 4-1 in the playoffs.
The 2016 73-win Warriors had blowout losses to the Pistons, Baby Lakers, Mavs and Trailblazers.
The 2023 Celtics got blow out in the regular season by the Clippers and Bucks, both of whom flamed out in the first round of the playoffs.
Basically, things happen and some nights you just don’t have it. The loss isn’t as big as the injury.
Right. The general fan base may have forgotten but we got blown out by LA in April last fucking year in the same fashion. This shit is meaningless
To be fair that was prior to y’all casting aside your inexperience demons and beating the Nuggets in 7 and then winning a chip.
Uncle Colin still has his fastball. Painting 98 on the corner.
This is disrespectful to fake Louis Vuitton bag
Yea, I get that it’s a pithy quote but at no point in the season has it been actually difficult to tell the difference between the Lakers and the Thunder.
I’m in Guangzhou right now, and at the Kinbao market, lol. Nobody on reddit can tell these fakes from the real things.
So who’s the birkin? Spurs?
bam adebayo
2017 warriors
I really don’t get this take (or any of the takes on those platforms)
Why can’t the lakers just be a good team who aren’t quite as good as the elite teams?
They’re the 3rd seed in the west! People talk about them like they’re scrapping to make the play in
Genuinely baffling coverage
I think its because of how loud the coverage has been about them during the stretch in March. Luka was cooking, team was pretty hot coming in to the matchup and talking heads were going out of their way to make proclamations about them competing. They’re a good team but not top tier and for the lakers that’s not acceptable
I mean yeah that’s fair, but the did put together a pretty awesome run (after the media had spent months absolutely sh*tting on Luka and the Lakers in general), so I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the team being praised when they basically went 15-2 in March!
They got absolutely destroyed last night by OKC, but it’s a single game in a season where they will once again win 50+ games and will finish as a top 4 seed in the West.
Everyone keeps saying ‘the west is the best conference’, so you can’t say that and then say the Lakers suck if they’re 3rd in said conference.
I just think the media coverage is ridiculously extreme - the Lakers are a good (but not great) team. But they aren’t the Washington Wizards! Although you’d think they were based on the coverage
I understand the shit you’re on, but people talked about the Lakers as if they were contenders, and them being 3rd seed meant something, that the ship had finally been turned around in March, but reality hit that, they could be FIRST seed, and the fact they can’t beat any actual contender team is the exact same issue that has knocked them out of the playoffs in both of the Luka years. When people see the standings you would assume that the Lakers are in competition with OKC and the Spurs, but the reality is their real competition are everyone in the 6-8 seeds.
Bit corny but I always remember some lines from the series Tokyo Ghoul when the Protagonist is getting thrashed that go about.
“Weak? No, He’s just too strong.”
Nuance is lost on the internet so if one team loses, they must be the absolute worse but the reality is the Lakers are exactly where belong. They are a good not the best and thats ok to acknowledge. Its completely possible to good at something and still get your ass kicked.
Cowherd is literally the “Tucker Carlson” of the NBA
Sometimes it’s hard to tell a fake Tucker Carlson from a real one until they’re next to each other.
im not sure who that is a bigger insult for.
Both of them can fuck off into the stratosphere tbh.
Mans just keeping it real here after that beatdown
YNs I swear.
Some Colin takes over the years:
If you did not have a father in your life growing up you will not be top tier and not worthy of franchise status.
wearing your hat backwards as a QB is an auto disqualification from elite QB discussion.
Sean Taylor somehow is responsible for his own demise.
Doing the dance the Dougie means you are not a franchise NBA player
Dominican/Caribbean born baseball players are not smart.
Something Something Andrew Dice Clay….
You date the stripper, never marry the stripper.
The last one I should have followed I guess.
Sorry we are all not experts in Coherdtology like you. We don’t have the worst things he has said memorized
This is just the Lakers news cycle every year and I’m so tired of it. They’re rarely ever contenders, their fans just desperately want them to be and the media feeds them that message all year
They’ve been pretty good since ASB to be fair. They were 16-2 in their last 18 until last night
You make this comment on every post.
Newsflash: Fans wanting their team to be good is universal
It’s not even the fans. It’s a media driven narrative because they’re one of the most prestigious franchises in the sports in a massively populated area. Media wants them to be good so bad and drives a narrative. Lakers in 5
The Nuggets and the Lakers have won the same amount of championships this decade. They’ve also played the same number of finals. “rarely ever contenders” with that flair is some statement alright.
They’ve matched your team. 😭
The arrogance of nuggets fans since 2023 would have you thinking they’ve won multiple titles in a row. They’ve beat one 50 win team in the playoffs this entire decade
and the lakers had a very good chance to win another, were far and away the best team, till solomon hill took lebron out who was looking like yet another fucking peak of his career.
but you have to watch basketball to know that.
they’re not on the level of OKC (hardly anyone is) but it’s disingenuous to act like the hype came from the name, they been playing great recently and have had great result
they not at that level for sure but let fans be fan, if you can’t get fired up after a 16-2 with your franchise player average 40, might as well eradicate the concept of fans altogether
17-6 since the all star break with wins vs some very good teams, OKC owns a lot of teams Lakers are not the first
OKC have smacked better teams than the Lakers, people like you who try to act like this are worse than the circlejerkers and i’m not even sure that a lot of people have been saying Lakers are a contender
I mean every teams fans want this bro. I feel like we are always a bit delusional when supporting our teams. But since they are so many stupid Laker fans unfortunately it just makes it seem like everyone is the same. But I knew since game one SA, OKC, and Den are above us come playoff time. Just fun to support the team until the season ends tbh.
15th in net rating lmao
dude this is just colin cowherd. this isnt even the news cycle. this guy just talks
What do you expect fans to do…? NOT want their team to be contenders? lol y’all will come up with any reason to trash talk Lakers fans.
Also I agree the media is a problem but it’s not like we control that either
Lebron’s energy/effort was not the problem last night
Going after Luka had nothing to do with MVP, that’s just how you have to play to beat the Lakers
He did make a good point about the playoffs and familiarity with a team. The Lakers of course could make similar adjustments to match up with their opponents. But they lack some of the versatility, especially defensively, that the other top teams have.
if you thought we are serious contenders before the OKC game you are absolutely fucking insane lmao
Lakers are trash confirmed
Confirmed
Banger of a line lmao
Damn that line was hard
Hes still around? Next you’ll tell me Jim Rome is still doing his thing.
Lebron should stop talking about Memphis and worry about his own shit 😂
everybody in the NBA clowns that shithole city, and y’all deserve it.
i hate cowherds guts but damn cant even be mad rn
Called the lakers fake demons 😭
This really a remix of “A Chrysler 300 look like a phantom until a phantom pull up”
If he doesn’t relate this to an ex wife I can’t really follow
It’s 80⁰, suns out, and the Thunder killed the Lakers last night. All time Friday night incoming
People thought the Lakers were contenders? They still don’t have defense or depth.
The lakers have impressed me during the last month. But I have never thought they could beat the Thunder or Spurs in a 7 game series.
He should’ve used and gave credit to Katt Williams for his version.
Why are we gassing up this bum
I’m annoyed at how good a line that is