Doris Burke: “You know how young people say you better come right. Well, they are coming right tonight”
jerkers, rejoice
She’s talking about comers, not just jerkers. Coffee’s for comers only.
She kink shamed the edgers smh
It’s calling yucking your yum
Which, coincidentally, is my kink.
You’re a yumyucker, should have known
Stop he can only get so erect!
SPLOOSH!
What’s an edger? 😜
ABC. Always Be Coming.
So that’s why they need brass balls
These jerk-leads are shit!
Put that cock down
C-O-M-E-R-S
OutJERKED by Doris Burke, god is good
U bum
And this is one of many reasons Doris got demoted
Doris “I love the young people” Burke
DILF
Dude. I. Love. Fishing.
Its “Dude Id Love to Fist”
“How do you do fellow kids?”
Shame because I think she is a good reporter. She brings too many narratives and storylines to the booth which distracts from the game
Also she has her favorites and will not shut up about how they do everything right even when they’re playing bad
This is the absolute worst thing about her commentating.
Imo the worst is how she doesn’t shut up once she’s started a point. Like she could be talking about Shai having a 20 point streak and then Anthony edwards could have a monster dunk and she would just continue talking about Shai
Imo the worst is how she doesn’t shut up once
Could have just ended it there.
Ehm not liking Doris Burke is like totally misogynistic and you just don’t want to see women in male dominated spaces!!!111!,
I was once called a misogynistic when I pointed out that Doris was a lot better when she started commentating comparing to the current era.
Underrated point. Switching to shouting about an exciting play should be a requisite for all color commentators across all sports!
Her love for Shai and Giannis trumps all lmao
Bro I was playing my career on 2k and it was a game of Timberwolves and Lakers, they did that “next games” thing and the Spurs were one of the games and this bitch starts going off on Wemby, it’s MY CAREER
Yeah when she devolves into sounding like a horny old Aunt lusting over someone, it gets to be a bit much.
The way she was talking about SGA last night, you’d think it was Yeates describing a fucking brook.
“Still. Calm. But present. He does what he needs to do.”
Lady he’s just shooting some fts.
I’m so fried rn I read “Yeat” and “brooks” and spent a good 5 minutes trying to figure out when Yeat the rapper spoke about Dillon Brooks of all people
William Butler Yeast
I was honestly cracking up yesterday as she was talking about SGA the whole first quarter at one point she said something like “He likes to joke around with the guys on the bus which is really important”
Insightful stuff. Human on earth likes jokes
MVP at being a fun guy to be around
He took notes from kawhi “fun guy” leonard ✍️
She gets off on slobbering on Tatum’s cock on national television
Someone will be like 1-13 and she’ll mention their good defense as they walk back after bricking another shot. It’s insane
Last season during a Suns win against Dallas, Luka missed a game-winner. All Doris could talk about was how great Luka’s shot was and how it was perfectly straight and online but just a bit short. Like bro he MISSED, his team lost, why are we glazing?
I cannot stand listening to her. One of the most ultimate of homers on the national broadcast if not the ultimate. Couldn’t say shit against OKC like about I. Heart flopping or the multiple bad calls against Minny after they already had to successfully use their two challenges. The refs were ass and Doris was ass. Fuck that lady
Throwback to when she asked about Kawhi’s free agency right after the 2019 championship
Her voice sounds like it could be on Sesame Street
Can we get her off the air? How does she still have a job??
Is she really that much worse than any other NBA announcer? I can’t even listen to most of them.
Yeah, I see why people can’t stand Doris. She just says things that don’t make any sense, or just come off as super awkward.
It’s not even that she just monologues every single play about nothing, and her voice doesn’t help either.
Any other announcer “SGA gets the smooth layup with the and 1!”
Dorris “you know the way SGA just swoops the ball into the glass really just highlights not just that he’s a good player but he’s a good leader he’s just so smart and makes everyone around him smart, and that’s why he’s the mvp. He does the work that no one else is ready to do and after doing it his team will follow suit. That’s why he’s at the top of the mvp ladder again”
Meanwhile 5 fucking possessions happened in that time span and instead of commentary it’s just her yapping.
My wife thought the hate was sexist and after 10 mins of it she stopped watching
Bro has listened to too much Doris. This is elite.
Like, could be a direct quote if I didn’t know any better lol
I just assumed he went back and got the quote initially. But who would force themselves to endure such torture?
Only the most extreme of masochists would subject themselves to extra Doris Burke commentary
Elite announcers: “Elizabeth im coming oh lawd. Crocodile dundee.”
Doris: “You know how young people say you better come right. Well, with that buzzer beating half court game winner, Josh Giddey is coming right tonight.”
I read that in her voice too lol
it is so easy too lol, that grating “I was double-fisting cigarettes in my youth” voice of hers..
This is art.
Right like we ain’t need all that doris
Embiid’s MVP season was when my eyes opened. Every sixer’s national broadcast was was a gawk-gawk 9000fest.
“Wow would you just look at JO-EL EMBIID. His story is so inspiring he came from Cameroon where he only started playing basketball at 14 where he had to share a half a basketball with his rabid pet hyena named Bobo. One of the greatest stars to ever do it. What a fascinating zero to hero story. A technical foul has been assessed to Jayson Tatum for even thinking about clapping”
She thought she was the poet laureate of the NBA
People thought she played way more ball than she did. while its not her fault she wasnt in the WNBA (missed it by about 8 years) she only played college. She has been given way to much fucking credit her whole career.
My god! You really came right & now i am coming right
Good shit you must be a youngin
So true. And I usually go out of my way to protect women in men’s sports (coaches, announcers, anyone!) but Doris is just reading from this bootlicking script. Every time SGA pushes off, a clear offensive foul, Doris: nobody in the game creates the ELITE separation that SGA can with his off hand, he uses that left shoulder so well to create space from the defender… five minutes later: Edward ma with the clear push off… that’s an offensive foul, look he’s gotta know better than that if he wants to beat a team as good as the Thunder…
She’s part of an older era I’d say. There’s a faster pace now. So all that talking skips over many parts of the game nowadays.
Great announcers from all eras know when to let the game do the talking.
Same problem I had with Mark Jackson and Jeff Van Gundy; they would frequently have very funny off-topic conversations mid-game but then it would turn into an actual back and forth and they’re missing the calls for the most impressive plays of the game lol; it got outta hand in the bubble season particularly. I miss them a lot though, cause not every game needs serious commentary you know?
Jeff was funny and entertaining though so I enjoyed it
He was a mixed bag. When he was on, he was great. However, he simply complained about the game way too much.
Nobody hated watching basketball as much as JVG. He had some nights where he was just brutal to listen to, vet much felt like old man yells at clouds.
What does second cousins mean? When people say that, I never know what they mean. Or what you’re allowed to do when you’re a second cousin.
Give me more Jackson and van Gundy tbh
Same deal when they do the woman announcer thing each year for my MLB team. I don’t even know if they’re good announcers or not because they just talk about women in sports the whole time, interviewing women, promoting women, etc.
Make it a pre-game special and then let them actually announce the game. I don’t want to be sold on women’s sports for 3 hours with a ballgame as the backdrop— but I might check it out before the game to get context on the announcers to enhance the actual broadcast. The way it’s done is like an infomercial selling women’s sports.
She absolutely blows at commentating
Typical Doris:
(role player makes routine layup)
DB: “Spectacular move! And that’s why —- is one of the most impressive and consistent players in the league, just an incredibly fluid and graceful move, like a ballet dancer…”
It sucks more because she honestly used to be pretty solid, time’s catching up
Took her too long to get a chance and by the time she did she was losing her touch. Sucks
This is such a funny narrative to me. Age isn’t an excuse for losing your touch on common sense. The corpse of Hubie Brown has more “touch” than her.
She’s the example of - just because you love something, doesn’t mean you’re good at it
but the thing is, she used to be good at it. she’s insufferable now but she used to be good at it
Normally I don’t get the hate and think she’s actually a good commentator… that being said, I can’t defend this one lmao
“They are coming right tonight” the score is 13 to 10
Somebody get the mop
“Quick actions, balls moving”
🫢
“Could anything thrust these Thunder higher?”
She is…..just awful
I agree. Its like she is working off a list of lines and has lost the ability to know when to plug them in.
Pack it up boys
Yeah but they’re on pace for 130-100, which is a huge blowout!
The score is 13 to 10? Just young enough for Karl Malone to be interested in the game.
Doris has a history of this
“It’s not just where you come it’s how hard you come”
And how hard you finish at the rim.
Balls moving…
Something something Dick Gradey
*at the cup
I heard she leaves a snail trail on her seat after every game she watches her favorite players
Aaaand I’m done with this thread.
and im not finished
We’re just getting started
Fucking hell, I was eating when I read this…
Escargot? 🐌
Unnecessary lol
Aren’t we supposed to be celebrating what we’re grateful for today?
Bruh
The “German and French don’t like each other” reference did not seem to go down as well as intended with the olds so now she’s pivoting to the youngins with this one
Playing both sides so she always comes out on top (please bring back Mark Jackson at this point)
Bonjour Mr. Hartenstein
And y’all wanted her to stop calling games. I bet y’all feel pretty dumb now.
Put her back on finals coverage
Please god no
She’s off her rocker
Some people get verbal diarrhea. She is one of those.
never saw a young person saying that
Yeah I’m pretty sure it’s “come correct” but maybe it’s just me
It is. Like 15 years ago.
i feel like that’s 90’s slang. Some shit RZA would be rapping
It is but people my age and younger discover longstanding AAVE and think it’s some new slang lmao
EDIT: Fascinating video on this by a linguist (with examples of how older generations did the same)
I mean you gotta give some time for mid-westerners to catch up. Shit it’s just like South Park said, Des Moines is 3 years behind the world.
Amazing self awareness.
“You gotta come original.”
-311
Future said something like that on TRIM with Playboi Carti
sure grandma, now lets get you to bed.
“Cum right. Don’t cum wrong” - young people
“Come as you are” -Cobain
“Come to America” - Eddie Murphy
“Come, my lady. Come come, my lady.”
Taking doris off the main broadcast is easiest the best thing to happen to the NBA since Jordan’s First return and it’s not even close.
She meant come correct, but felt it was too ghetto to say it lmao.
Apparently calling a close defender “in his grill” multiple times didn’t cross that line though. Boris. You are 60 years old. Shut up.
Boris Durke
Just please narrate the game
Talk about sets that are going on
So funny because even “better come correct” is slang from the era of a 90’s soda commercial
Auntie Doris
quick decisions, balls moving, and coming right
Explosive finish.
They are in there just banging in the hole all night
Brought to you by OnlyFanduel
Bro fire her already
It isn’t clocking to you that I’m standing on business, is it?
LMAO exactly
Freaky ahhh Doris
https://youtu.be/bwBYDIDeHO8?si=50hGTQa1KqZVVOTO
She seems to like the word “come” for some reason.
She said what!?
What? She’s exhausting to listen to
Now if Richard Jefferson’s little 14 year old self was still paired up with her on the broadcast for that one.
“Doris, I would like to come right every night when I was a player.” (RJ school girl Giggle)
“That’s right Richard. You were a player that came most nights. That’s your DNA. Maybe you didn’t come all nights, I’m sure we have tape. You left your DNA imprint on the game”
“I hope you don’t have any tape-”
“BANG! ANTMAN FOR 3, He’s really coming hard tonight.”
“That’s bad news for him, he doesn’t need any new ones on the way. ” -RJ
“The thing about a Anthony edwards, he loves watching tape to get better. I for one love watching the Ant Man bang away on film, such passion, such virility on display. Bang away Anthony you are a treasure.”- DB
She’s the fuckin worst.
Is this the gooners you youngsters talk about?
“I told this group of kids this a really funny joke the other day - why was six afraid of seven? - I couldn’t even get to the punchline!”
I will always remember the random totally legal Livestream chat message I read:
“When will they replace Dumpy Doris with a hot black chick??’
Okay Grandma, let’s get you back to bed
This is what’s annoying about her. The constant pandering / mild appropriation.
Someone hits a layup:
Marv Albert: “Yes, it counts!”
Kevin Harlan: “What a move inside, he is Houdini!”
Doris: “the cool cat with the LAY, say it with your chest!”
Hard to listen to the game when she’s on the mic because she’s such a cringe factory.
I think she meant “they better come correct”. That’s what young people say Doris lol. So come correct
Doris Jurke
“Always be coming.”
-Glengarry Glen Ross
Doris so freaky 😂
Unfortunately she sounds like a guy pretending to be a woman on a prank call lol
Now let’s go to the New York Knickerbockers…
‘ayo
Slurrin’ Doris is the drizzlin’ shits. NBA teams and national broadcasts have some of the worst TV commentators and play by play people in sports history. It’s weird.
Always Be Cringe. Doris is the leader of that crew
you know how young people say you better come right
No, I don’t know that. Do they say that?
Doris Burke is sooo cringe
Doris in mid season form I see
Doris could be one of the worst announcers of all time. I only watched 6 minutes of this game and my ears were bleeding. She’s atrocious.
Ayo
I always pick up a plate from the table on the right side of the guest and I always bust a nut to the right of the person I’m stalking. I was raised with manners.
Shit i can never hate Doris she like that auntie thats a little quirky, a little slow sometimes. Happy thanksgiving yall
“Them young boys coming” - Charles Barkley
One of the worst to ever do it. Legend!
its “you better come correct” is she a diversity hire or smthn i dont get how she got this job
Just speak English, jeez.
I cannot stand Doris Burke and her sexually charged commentary
I can’t believe she said this on live tv and still has a job get this horny old woman off the air!
This is why she got demoted
She doesn’t know any young people
Doris has to be one of the most in-authentic people on tv. Completely disingenuous with how she talks and makes it sound horrid.
Either talk like you normally talk or get off the mic.
I hate her so much
Damn right Doris; go get you some.
My goodness
Just wish she said that when the Magic were playing the Raptors in a classic Black Dick matchup
She is the female version of Bill Walton but less cool
I’m old enough to remember when NBA fans and this sub loved Doris.
How is this woman real? It’s gotta be one big inside joke at this point
They are coming right now!
I remember a few years back if you said a negative word about her you’d get downvoted into oblivion and accused of sexism. Glad most people woke up and see her for how annoying she is these days 😌
Doris postgame, “ I am going to personally guarantee all these strong young men come right tonight. I haven’t rubbed out a power foward since Dolf Shayes!”
You know how young people say nut butter. Well there is certainly plenty of that tonight.
“Ohhhhh! Bonjour Mr. Hartenstein!”
doris off an edible
her husband better be ready that night
She a freak
I think it’s come correct ya tub
Why is she still on the air? No one wants to listen to her.
No Dorris.. I don’t know what the hell youre talking about
STFU Doris
Can someone link a clip where an announcer said something that “young people say”, and it actually worked?
How do you do fellow kids